


Better Than a Dog or Cat

by ifishouldvanish



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Pets, Rumbelle is Hope
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-22
Updated: 2016-10-22
Packaged: 2018-08-24 01:39:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8351311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifishouldvanish/pseuds/ifishouldvanish
Summary: The Golds decide to adopt a pet, but can't agree on what kind.





	

 

“A… a cat?” Mr Gold asks meekly, his eyes fixed warily on the adorable black kitten in the crate.

“What's wrong?” Belle frowns. “You don't like cats?”

“Well,” Gold mumbles, glancing across the pet store at the canines. “I consider myself more of a dog person. You know… man's best friend an’ a’ that.” he shrugs, wrinkling his nose. “A-a-a—” he stammers, “A nice big one! Like a guard dog.”

“You'd trust a large dog like that around the baby?” Belle asks, eyeing him like he's got two heads.

“ _Cats_ are the ones with predatory instincts, Belle.” Gold insists, rubbing a hand over his nose. “A good _dog's_ instinct is to protect! If I can't protect this family with dark magic, at least let us get a… a Rottweiler? Doberman Pinscher? German Shepherd? A Mastiff, maybe?”

“Rumple, those are practically horses!”

“Well, it’s no matter.” He says decisively. “...I'm allergic to cats.”

“Oh, _really?_ ” Belle groans, narrowing her eyes at him. “You've never mentioned _anything_ about that before.”

“Aye. Terribly so.” He nods. “And why _should_ I mention it? There were no cats at the dark castle! There was no reason to bring it up!”

“I'm pretty sure dark ones don't get allergies…” She murmurs skeptically.

“Well _I’m_ certain they _do_. It's taking a lot of magic to keep from sneezing at this very moment.” He snips. “But what would I know, I’ve only been one for three-hundred bloody years…” He mumbles under his breath.

Belle shoots him a chastising glare. “...Fine. No cats.” She relents. “But no beefy guard dogs either! Something gentle, smaller.”

“Sweetheart!” Rumple groans. “Nobody likes a _wee_ doggie! Bloody _yappy_ things!”

“I didn’t say anything about it being _wee!”_ She retorts, beginning to head across the store to see the dogs. “I just mean like… a Golden Retriever, or a Labrador. ...Maybe a Dalmatian— like Pongo! He’s a great dog!”

“Oh!” Gold scoffs, following after her. “Should we get a white picket fence as well? Have another one and a half children?”

“Might it ever occur to you that things become popular for a reason?” Belle groans.

“Ah, but not necessarily good ones—”

Belle's face suddenly lights up. “Aww, Rumple!” She sighs, rushing up to one of the crates. _“Look at him!”_ She whispers, stepping aside so he can see the sleeping Beagle puppy.

“No.” He says flatly.

Belle flashes him the most pathetic blue eyes she can muster. _“No?”_

“Sweetheart— Beagles are notorious for their bark! You think you're having a hard time sleeping now? Wait till you invite that thing into the house.” Shaking his head, he paces along the wall of enclosures and stops at a three-year-old Sheltie named Abby. “How about her?” He asks, nodding toward the crate. The dog eagerly gets up begins wagging her tail. “Seems friendly.”

Belle steps up to the crate and the Sheltie immediately bars her teeth and growls. Belle jumps back and frowns. “I don't think she likes me…”

Mr Gold steps closer and Abby immediately relaxes, rushing up to the front of her crate to sniff and lick him. “Aye, good girl…” He murmurs in a thick brogue, offering her his hand. “Folks like us have tae stick together, don't we, lassie?”

Belle inches closer again and Abby growls at her a second time. “Yeah, I don't think so, Rumple.”

Rumple glances at her with a lopsided grin as Abby continues to happily sniff and lick at his fingers. “You sure, dearie?”

“Yeah.” Belle huffs, visibly jealous. “Hey, what about this one?”

They go back and forth pointing out potential pups. One is too big, the other too small. Too aggressive. Too lazy. Too loud. Too high-maintenance. Too hyperactive. Eventually they wander off, resigning themselves to looking at fish, hamsters, rabbits, and ferrets. Belle excuses herself to use the restroom, but when she returns, Rumple is nowhere to be found.

“I think she's taken a liking to you, Mr Gold.” A woman says.

“Y-You think so?” Belle hears her husband ask hopefully.

“Most reptiles just tolerate being handled, but she really seems content with you!”

Belle follows their voices to the aisle of reptiles to find her husband talking to an employee, cradling something in his arms. “Rumple?” She asks, stepping closer.

He spins around, revealing the spiny green-gold creature beginning to climb up his chest.

“What are you—” Belle jumps back and blinks. “What's _that?”_

“It's an Inland Bearded Dragon, sweetheart.” He glances down at it with a smile. “...They ah, call 'em Beardies for short.”

 _“Oh.”_ Belle chokes out, watching as it crawls up and around his shoulders.

“You don't like it?” He asks. His eyes look bereft, but he can't seem to drop the smile the lizard has put on his face.

“No, I—” Belle stammers, stepping closer. “It's just… different.”

“You must be Mrs Gold,” the woman says, extending a hand. “I'm Jane. Your husband was telling me you're looking to add a new member to your family.”

“Yeah, we uh, can't seem to agree on anything.” Belle admits, accepting Jane's hand.

“Finding a pet that's good with young children is a challenge,” Jane says, “especially when you have to rule things out because of allergies and other restrictions. Most people never consider reptiles as family pets because they think they're dangerous, but a Beardie like the one your husband is handling can be a great option. They have surprisingly docile temperaments despite their rather uninviting appearance.”

Belle looks back to her husband, who's now holding the animal up against his chest. He's smiling down at it, stroking his forefinger along its chin. The Beardie closes her eyes and gapes it's mouth in response, clearly enjoying itself.

“I don't know…” Belle mumbles. “Don't you have to feed those things live crickets or something?”

“Or roaches.” Jane says. “But as an adult, the Beardie's diet will consist mostly of vegetables and leafy greens.”

“ _Roaches?”_ Belle asks weakly.

Jane laughs. “Most people start with crickets, but eventually realize it's much easier to feed them roaches. Silkworms are a great option as well.”

“Rumple, I don't know.” Belle sighs.

He's still stroking the Beardie's chin, only now he's begun cooing at it. _“Who's a pretty lass…”_

Belle steps over, leaning over his shoulder to admire the creature up close. It’s eyes open slowly, pupils blown wide. It almost looks like it’s _smiling_. “Well, I mean… I suppose she _is_ kind of cute?”

“Would you like to hold her, darling?” He asks, his brown eyes twinkling.

“I— Okay,” She agrees, reaching out for it.

“Nah-ah-ah, dearie,” Rumple tuts, pulling back and resting a hand over the animal protectively. “Wash your hands first,” he says, nodding towards the hand sanitizer dispenser.

With a huff, Belle pumps some sanitizer onto her hands. Under Jane's supervision, she lets her husband place the lizard in her arms, while he instructs her to mind its head and tail so she doesn't startle it.

The texture of the animal's reptilian skin is off-putting at first, but Belle quickly gets used to it. As her grip relaxes, so to does the Beardie, who rests its head comfortably on her arm and closes its eyes. Belle takes a moment to admire all the spiny scales around its head and the beautiful coloring on its back.

“She… she _is_ cute. In her own way…” Belle admits as she studies its dreamily content face, and Rumple beams. “She uh—” Belle chuckles, “She kinda reminds me of somebody…”

Mr Gold scoffs. “Aye?”

“...Yeah.” Belle looks into her husband's eyes for a moment. “A little rough around the edges, but uh, gentle where it counts.”


End file.
